How did we get here?

HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY ANDREW!

Yes, that's my brother.
He's growing into a fine young man, and I am proud of him in every single way imaginable.
Yes, we have our disagreements and the moments lacking maturity...but I believe God has HUGE plans for this lil guy.
This is for you!

Cheers!



The first Monday of the year started with orientation, and a very long one at that.
This feeling of being out of place, everyone just seems a lil young.

Some too gung-ho for their own good, some a lil withdrawn...but all still so young.
As much as being elected the team leader and mixing around a little here and there, this unshakable feeling was still there.
There are times when you're surrounded by tonnes of people, but yet you feel all so alone and lonely.

I'm praying that things will become better and that God will continue to be there.
After all, it's only the first day.
We're all afraid of change, but sometimes God brings change to take us out of the comfort zone and introduce us to newer things, to achieve greater heights...

I just can't help but wished she was here as I opened another important chapter in life.
As I stepped into adulthood, she was there.
When I started my first official "job", she was there.
When I graduated with a degree in my hands, she was there.

Through the short moments, she's been through important phases in my life.
And how I wished that things didn't have to turn out the way they did.
As I set down during lunch hour today, I realized that absence that has constantly been gnawing at me continued to plague me.

So many people around me, and I realized how empty and lonely one could get despite being among people.
Even surrounded by people around you, there was still a big gap...

Yet...God made me realize that He was there even before I was born and He is always there.
I realized I had allowed myself to forget my Maker, my Creator, my best friend, the One person who has never let me down.
Earthly life seems pretty meaningless now, but I realize that I have a Heavenly home...a mission to complete on Earth before I move on.
This mission was the driving purpose that kept me going from past time even till now.

She was the first person whom I've learned to lavish unconditional love upon...
But God will always be the One whom I will depend on for all things.
Even as I start off this new chapter in life, I realized that it is indeed time to grow up and mature.
This unconditional love, belongs to her.

But I will always know that God will always be that source of which I draw this love from, and He is exactly who I will always turn to...for His love is the ultimate unconditional love.
Naturally, humans are never perfect and I realize now that if you put so much hope and expectations...the tendency to be hurt is there.
As humans the tendency is to expect, and yet I would love to run the opposite direction.
Men will always disappoint, but God will never disappoint.

I'm hoping that even as I start off this new year afresh, everything else will begin and a new beginning will emerge.
I will let this broken heart heal again, and protect it from its very fragile state.
This is my hope, that when this heart has healed completely and learned to beat again...that I will go all out and do great exploits to the person who gave it all for me...

My Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

PS: How to Deal with Your Broken Heart by Susan Tang is a good read. Mum's making me read it all over again. Lets hope it helps. : )