Thursday, March 26, 2009

Execute when all else fails...

When lights ahead dim to unfamiliar darkness,
And silence carries about an eerie echo in the air,
You stumble to find your footing, mind's a mess,
I cringe in my comfort zone, afraid...nobody really cares.

Good day people.

Its a freakin Thursday night and I should be out playing futsal. Tonight however, I fail to get into the mood (and for the first time too) and my mood really has deserted me. So I decided to excuse myself from sweating it out. Its just when the week regressed from bad to worse. Tomorrow I'll have to go back to the police station to get the picture of my car taken. Yes, I was in an accident. Who cares anyway?

Everyday's been kind of a blur nowadays as time just seems to whizz by and deadlines continue to approach. Not everyone's been helpful either. Some people just refuse to answer my questionnaire and thus I'm lacking a seriously large amount of people to fulfill my sample size. I refuse to get annoyed, irritated, or lose my cool in any manner. Its your choice.

I'm sorry for saying this, but I've lost focus in life. I need to gather my focus and look to Him for strength cause my human strength is inadequate and I've fallen so far and failed miserably. I cannot do this everyday already. I came to a point when I've told myself, "screw life, screw assignments, screw this...."

I seriously need to replenish my strength.

Lord, in this tough time, I pray that You'll be here for me as You always have been. In the darkest times when its the darkest, I know you're right here. Teach me to wait on You, to trust in You for everything, and to love You with everything I've got. My life is spiralling downwards and You know it. I know You will see me through this phase.

In Jesus name,

PS: I need a friggin holiday. Having those days when it feels like nobody cares. So unloved...

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